Welcome to Squirtonline.com. Elements stolen with permission from Jeffrey Zeldman, God bless 'im. Don't you do it. Instead, tell me you love me. Lie if you have to.

 updated February 24, 2008.

I've become a loan shark, and you can, too. Read about The Squirtonline Prosper.com Experiment.

Read my Guide on eBay: How to Spot a Fake North Face Womens Nuptse Jacket.

See what North Face items I'm selling on eBay! Join my private customer list and get free shipping on your next purchase!

I like to save money by doing nothing and I thought you might, too. Here are three super easy, painless ways to save hundreds of dollars a year. I'm not talking about cutting coupons or filling out rebate forms (not that there's anything wrong with that.)

I live for spring. If any of you are interested in gardening, I'm documenting my experiments with Mail Order Gardening. If a lazy gardener like me can get these plants to grow, I'm sure they'll flourish in your garden!

It sounded irresistible -- earn commissions from Google, eBay and Clickbank with one website with no hosting fees. I signed up www.dailydealspot.com and we'll see what happens. Check it out!

New Squirtonline essay! Squirtonline's Life Lessons: The Dating Pre-Game. Tell me what you think!

New Squirtonline survey! How I Asked Out My Crush. Ever do something wacky to get your crush's attention? Did it work? Share the wealth!

How to Tell if Someone Likes You was updated. Newest entries are listed first.

And I've been writing epinions.

Chloe needs your questions! She'll be updating the column as soon as she gets a few more quandaries to chew over. This column: Lots of crush advice, betrayals, perverts, confusing signals and a potential poacher.

Or, check out the Advice Archive. You know you want to. 

The peeps speak. This week: A supernatural tale: The Unwanted Lady. She's no lady! Put your tale here, why don'tcha?

Or, check out the Tales Archive. Who knows what's in there?