Due to the volume of responses I receive, I am unable to...um, not really. I'm sure I'll have more than enough time to mull over your question. (I might even get carried away.)

Today's Column: Should I ask him out?

 

Hey Gang!

I've got a lot of people asking me, how can they find out whether their crush likes them, or how can they approach their crush without looking like a dork. Sure, you could check out the Squirtonline survey, How to Tell if Someone Likes You, but some of you bravehearts must have hooked up with your honeys (I sure hope so!) So tell me, what worked for you? Let me know and I can tell the peeps!

Thanks!

 

Dear Chloe,

I like this boy in my school but I don't know if he likes me. Should I ask my friends to ask him out for me or should I wait until he asks me? What should I do?

Sincerely,

Sitting Pretty

 

Dear Sit,

I do not recommend having your friends approach him for you. It's really...how shall I put this...lame.

When I was younger, I'd hope that guys I liked (who never knew I existed, because I hid behind my shyness) would somehow notice me and ask me out. Guess what? They didn't. If I could live my life again, I'd suck it up and take a few more risks. Definitely don't ignore body language, however. Here's an example:

I once had a crush on a beach guard. Semi-beefcake, with possible left AND right-side brain development. I got word that he'd said I was cute, so I decided to approach him one day while he was, um, guarding. (Sitting in his car and leafing through a catalog.) I asked him if he would help me fix my bike (which I knew was a weak opening, but judging by my brothers, I thought all guys were into that stuff).

He shot me down without lifting his eyes from his magazine. Eh, what? I tried again to start a conversation, because I didn't want to believe he was that rude (and uninterested). Har, har! Not. I mean, a pretense of common courtesy is all I'm asking for. Two-, three-quarters of a second of eye contact, and I'm good.

I can't explain why he totally snubbed me. I may have embarrassed him by approaching him while he was on duty. But who cares? Even though my plan blew up in my face, I was proud of myself for making the effort. And it got me over that crush pretty darn quick. Lesson learned.

I hope my feeble story helps. If YOU let him know how you feel, even if he turns you down, you'll still feel good about your courageous self. That's a priceless confidence-booster. Plus, you start to get a feel for what works and what doesn't. And, you'll develop a little more compassion for people who approach you, which makes you more accessible. The last thing you want is an unapproachable rep. Good luck, and let me know what happens. If things don't work out the way you want them to, don't lose a wink of sleep over it. Just let it go and move on to the next guy.

 Bonus question!

Dear Chloe,

I have the biggest crush on this guy, we never met, he knows who I am, he looks at me like he really likes me and wants to say something, but I don't know if he really likes me or not.

Sincerely,

Sitting Pretty's Sister

 

Dear Sis,

You're over thinking this. Girls are pretty good at deciphering body language, and even if you aren't, the long looks are a giveaway that he'd like to get to know you. Why else?

You could make things a little easier for the young lad, who is probably too intimidated to approach you. If he knows you than there must be something for you to talk about. If you have a mutual friend, set something up. There are a lot of shy guys out there, unfortunately, which means sometimes that making a move falls on our shoulders. I'm sure he'll be very grateful.

Hugs and kisses,

 


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So, what's on your mind, sweetie?

 

 

Disclaimer: This column is for entertainment purposes only. I am not a professional therapist or licensed anything for that matter. But that doesn't mean that I don't care.

I reserve the right to edit for grammar, brevity, content, etc. If you'd like to discuss something you've seen here, I invite you to share your experiences. Don't keep it a secret! I welcome your comments.

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