Chloe's so sorry she's waaay behind with her column. Please be patient, she'll get to all of your questions eventually!

Today's Column: Boys asking about girls and...that's it!

 

Dear Chloe,

I really like this girl and she's really nice and pretty. She's been having some troubles with her boyfriend and she's breaking up with him, but I think it's because she likes me more. She's always giving me hints, letters and she's at my locker every period. Is it possible that she likes me back?

Sincerely,

billabong_boy

 

Dear bill,

Sure it's possible...even though it's not cool the way she's breaking up with her guy.

It's great to be on this end of her attention span, but is there any reason why she wouldn't eventually treat you the same way she treating her soon-to-be-ex boyfriend?

 

Dear Chloe,

I am a kind of guy who likes beautiful girls but the thing is, I am afraid of rejection. There are these nice looking girls at school, I always look at them and feel I love them very much. All that is happening is I am confused, I don't know whom to approach because I see a lot of nice girls around. And I am afraid of approaching nice girls. I always ask myself what am I going to say as a start. I think I am weak or not normal some how being afraid of girls and not knowing the tactics of asking a girl out no matter her beauty. Please help me choose a girl and how do I approach a girl especially when we don't know each other.

Sincerely,

Kriz

 

Dear Kriz,

Most people are afraid of rejection...but how much would me miss out on if we never take a risk?

And dude, what (straight) guy doesn't like beautiful girls? It's a mistake to totally focus on the hot girls whom you're too intimidated to approach. There are an awful lot of cool chicks out there who have a lot more going for them than their looks. And would you want someone to date you just because she thought you were hot? Of course not.

Asking someone whom you don't know for a date is one of the toughest moves in the business. Unless you've got nerves of steel, a tough hide and oodles of self confidence it's very hard to pull off. So I always tell people the same thing: to meet people you have to be where they are. If you are both doing the same thing at the same time, it's a lot easier to get a convo going. So get involved in some after-school activity that interests you. Friendships naturally form between people who share common ground. Pretty soon you'll get invited somewhere and a friend of a friend will introduce you to someone and...voila!

So I don't advise approaching someone you don't know. Try to make friends first -- girls tell me they do it all the time with guys they're crushing on.

 

Dear Chloe,

There is this girl in my school and she just got a boyfriend. Her boyfriend is a friend of mine. Since I came to that school she has been looking at me a lot and smiling. I think she likes me but I don't know what to do or say, so I was wondering if you can help me :(

Sincerely,

yama_mok

 

Dear yama,

Don't guys have some kind of code that says you don't poach your bud's girl? Well, you should.

I'm not going to tell you how to snag someone else's girlfriend. I mean, dude, what are you thinking? Cause you're not going to like it when it happens to you. What goes around comes around.

 

Dear Chloe,

I really enjoy giving and receiving oral sex, however it seems I "give" it way too often without receiving. So I guess my question is how to get my girlfriend to do it more often.

Thanks.

Sincerely,

Tony

 

Dear Tony,

Selfish people suck, don't they? Well, except when you want them to, I suppose.

I'd say you have a few options. One, have you asked her to reciprocate? Be gentle when encouraging her because she obviously doesn't like doing it. There's no reason why you can't ask for what you want. And she may need some positive reinforcement. I've heard one expert suggest that your partner imagine it's a fudgsicle, or something that, er, tastes better to her.

Two, withhold your services until she starts pulling her weight in bed.

You're going to have to decide how important this is to you. Is it worth breaking up over? Because guaranteed you'll be able to find someone who does know how to return a favor. Someone who's selfish in one area is usually selfish in...all areas. And that doesn't make for a healthy and satisfying relationship.

 

Dear Chloe,

I am a shy 20 year old male. I met this girl on a dating telephone line. For two days we were talking a lot, now it seems as if I have run out of things to talk about. Sometimes I will really want to talk and no one is around, then when someone comes around I forget what I wanted to talk about. I think that I am starting to bore her. Well my question is, what are topics that you can talk about with a girl?

Sincerely,

acheese

 

Dear cheesy,

I have a terrible memory, so often I'll jot down notes to myself that I know I'll forget. You could do the same, whenever you hear something interesting.

Everyone digs different things, but I suppose you could talk about movies, music, current events, school, something funny or weird that happened to you, a cool website, tv. I used to love listening to Art Bell's radio show and I'd often talk about what went down on his program the next morning at work. It depends on what she's into. For example, I don't know much about cars, but I like learning about them. If you ask her questions about what she did over the weekend, you might get clues into what interests her. I've never been into those dating lines, because I don't enjoy talking on the phone. But I used to chat on instant messenger all the time, and eventually, you just run out of things to say to people. With some people you can keep the pseudo-relationship going longer than others, but when you don't physically interact with someone, there's only so far you can take things. If I were you, I'd join something where I could meet people, in the flesh. It's a lot easier to find topics to discuss when you're out there doing stuff. Plus you'll be too busy to worry about whether you're boring some girl or not.

Hugs and kisses,

 


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