This is Part II of the ever-evolving "How to Tell if Someone Likes You." Feel free to post your comments via the textbox below!
This page is about participation. Share your wisdom or learn from what others have said already. If you want help with your crush, ask our advice columnista, Chloe.
On to Part II!
In any instant, I know where I stand on who's company I'd enjoy, but I have absolutely no insight into the female consciousness. All relationships I've been in have led to my overall confusion at every step. I know that my personality yields an ultimate shyness in social situations. I have difficulty opening to anyone because I find mostly pain. I've never been on the winning end of any relationship. It's always been me getting my ass kicked by my ignorance of how to act around women. I mean I can handle any situation on a mature level but I can't ever make the jump into "knowing" for sure. I need definite proof. Like slap me upside the head and then give me a hug or something. The interaction never proceeds more than some sort of confused state of flirtation but I'm just a fool when it comes to these things. Always have been and will probably maintain it for the sake of my own sanity in defense.
I know you didn't ask for any advice, but I'm going to give it to you. You must have learned something from your prior relationships, but otherwise leave the past in the past. Your attitude sucks, frankly. Sure, it's risky to put yourself out there. But you expect to find pain, so there's no surprise that you always do. As far as your ignorance on how to act around women - I don't buy it. There's no mystery -- treat people the way you want to be treated. If you're not getting respect, cut your losses and move on. Women (or anyone) can't take advantage of you unless you let them. It's really that simple.
When I like a guy, I take it slow at first. I talk to him as much as I can, I will just walk up to him and think of something to say, ask him if he wants me to get something for him at school, like going up and getting a folder or something. I'd call him, and write him letters, and tell him I think he is cute and ask what he thinks of me. I talk to him as much as possible, and I flirt with him all the time. I try to interact with him as much as I can, and try to figure out what he thinks of me. My friends help sometimes, and sometimes, I'll write him a note or email or I'll call him just to talk, and I'll ask him either by phone, email or letter what he thinks of me. I then hope for the best.
If I like a guy, I stare at him, and when he catches me staring, I either keep on staring at him with a serious gaze, or look down very slowly. I also try to figure out his schedule so that I can run into him often. And last, but not least, I ask things about him to his friends or to people whom I know talk to him often. This way, those people will tell him I was asking about him, because, as human beings, we just can't keep our mouths shut. If he likes me, he'll do something (hopefully!!!)
I like to tease sometimes.
Well as an extremely shy person, I don't know if anything I say can be of much help...except maybe showing the side of the shy person who NOBODY EVER KNOWS has a crush on them in the first place. It's truly a frustrating existence. I find it hard to express anything towards my crush. Which is why I'm lookin' here in the first place. I'm sort of in need of advice and whatnot. But then I realize most of the people that have posted on here are rather bold, and I envy them for that. When I have a crush on someone, I pretty much get dead quiet around them. When he talks to me, sure I'll look him in the eye, but if he looks intensely into mine, I tend to break my gaze and look at the floor. If he paid attention at all, he'd notice when I stare at him. Then again, I only do that either from a safe distance or in a situation where I know he won't notice. I can't even have a decent conversation with him 'cause I get so nervous when he's around. It's like my mind draws a blank. Now do you think I'm getting very far with this guy? Of course not...Although there has been some current progress since he kissed me recently for some reason. And I don't mean a peck on the cheek either. Maybe I don't have to try as hard as I think I should. Who knows, I still can't figure it out.
I look him straight in the eye...lots of eye contact, smiling, and I try to seem interested in what he has to say. You know beauty and brains never go together.
If a guy likes a girl, he should just come right out and say it and not depend on non-verbal signals to do all of the work.
What's my secret...haha..got mo game then Nintendo, that's all...
When I like a guy, I smile and am totally confident in front of them...also some mysterious smiles will have the guy totally in the palm of your hand...
I just flirt my ass off, then if they flirt back (which they usually do), I ask if there is any chance we could be more then friends. If there is, then, way to go! If not...NEXT. But playin' guys is way more fun then being with one! LOL
I look for ways to share a laugh.
I prefer the guy making the first move.
Walk straight up to the guy you like, look confident, look him straight in the eyes and whisper in his ear: "I know something you don't know." If the guy is interested, he will come back to you asking you what is it. Let him do this like four times and if you feel he likes you, tell him what he doesn't know.
What is my opinion? Well, I would like it if a guy made the first move, but if I want that guy bad enough, I will go for it.
If you ever find the answer PLEASE let the other million of us wondering know...Don't you get sick of dropping hints and going from hot to cold...never knowing where you stand? Come on guys, give us a break...
Life is a lot less complicated when you assume that if he doesn't call you, then he is not interested. Period. Who's got time to wonder why? I sure don't. Give me a guy who knows what he wants. And whom.
I know when a girl likes me because she will call every day and night, and she comes over to watch a movie or something. Things like that!!!
I figured out that if you act slightly "high" in some situations it can get the ladies, cause you act cool and relaxed and you mainly listen to them.
I make direct eye contact when he's talking to me, and when I know he's looking at my eyes I slowly drop them down and check him out so that he sees me do it. LoL. Can't miss that one!
~ And massages NEVER fail! ~
I'll just be myself and be cute. I also act as if I knew them for years. Which make them feel comfortable talking to me. I then watch and see if they pay attention to me or if they're looking somewhere else. You can usally tell from that.
When I happen to be alone with someone, I tell them how I feel. And let it flow from there.
I have this neck lanyard-thingie for my Contractor's ID Badge (itself a chick magnet) that is very cool. It has the company's logo on it and a neat feature where you can actually zzz--ipp out the badge on a retracting string-thingie and swipe elevator and doorway electronic locks with it. A total turn-on.
When I flirt, which I do often and with abandon, I simply zip my badge in and out, in and out, and wink suggestively. Sometimes I blush and drool simultaneously.
Yeow! I must confess, I dig guys who blush and do anything often and with abandon.
When I want a guy to notice me, I usually purposely walk past him in the hallway or something and just smile, works like a charm :) Most of the time guys do that to me...I only do that to the cute SHY ones...You know what I mean!
When I like a guy I smile and laugh a lot. Even if his story drags slowly, I never cut eye contact. If there is a lull in the conversation I may stare at his lips. I may even touch his arm or playfully tap him if we're joking around. Unfortunately, every guy I've done this to seems absolutely clueless to the fact that I'm flirting!
I imagine it is some kind of colloquial derivative of 'out of ideas' or something...
So anyway, without sounding cocky myself, or suggesting that you should be cocky/arrogant yourselves, if you just kinda assume that the girl likes you, it cuts out a lot of the crazy mind bending thoughts of reading body language, etc. If she turns you down, then she turns you down. Of course you increase your chances of getting turned down, but you'll get used to it...(I know I have) but at the same time, you'll increase your chance of getting with her, cos after all, girls love a guy with confidence...or so I'm told.