Due to the volume of responses I receive, I am unable to...um, not really. I'm sure I'll have more than enough time to mull over your question. (I might even get carried away.)

Today's Column: Girls are confusing.


Hey Gang!

I've got a lot of people asking me, how can they find out whether their crush likes them, or how can they approach their crush without looking like a dork. Sure, you could check out the Squirtonline survey, How to Tell if Someone Likes You, but some of you bravehearts must have hooked up with your honeys (I sure hope so!) So tell me, what worked for you? Let me know and I can tell the peeps!



Dear Chloe,

I've always thought that a girl flirts with you if she is interested in you, but I've read from you and others that if a girl really likes you, she will not flirt with you, but rather flirt with other guys around you to make you jealous. I'm confused and hope you can clarify this.




Dear Simon,

I would love to clarify for you...but I can't.

In the freewheeling sport of love, there are no hard and fast rules. Sure, silly girls will waste time flirting with other guys to try to get you jealous, but different types of head cases flirt for different reasons:

  1. She likes the attention from boys in general. Who doesn't want to be popular?
  2. She likes the attention from you in particular.
  3. She can tell that you like her and it gives her a power trip to mess with your head.
  4. She likes you but she has a boyfriend.
  5. She likes you and she wants you to see that she is desired by other guys, because that increases her market value.
  6. She likes you but she is too shy to flirt with you, so she flirts with other guys, hoping that you'll see that she is a fun and approachable gal.
  7. She really likes you and wishes you would ask her out already.
  8. She's a shark who thinks all boys are playthings. You know, the ones your mum warned you about.

So you see, I really can't pin it down any further than that. Anything that involves feelings always gets more complicated than it has to be. I guess I feel sort of comfortable saying that eight or nine times out of ten, flirting is a sign that she possibly digs you. Otherwise, it's just too much energy put forth on something that's not going to go anywhere.

If there is a specific special someone you are referring to, I can try to sort it out for you, if you give me some details. Let me know!

 Bonus question!

Dear Chloe,

I went to this girl's house, and we sat and talked. Then we started wrestling and getting kind of close. Then I had to go home. So when she drives me home, she gets out and says, "I'll walk you to your door." When we get there, she says, "Well, I gotta go pick up my mom, so I'll talk to you later."

She gives me a hug and then makes out with me. I have only known her for about a month now. Does this mean she likes me??? We're not goin' out yet, I mean we've been to the movies and to each other's houses. But I just don't know if she likes me or not. Help me out if you can.




Dear Jarett,

C'mon, Jarett. Let's just say, for the sake of argument, that you're not pulling my leg.

It's not enough that she's doing ALL the work, and that she's hanging out one-on-one on these non-dates. BUT, she MAKES OUT with you while she's SOBER, and you still can't tell whether she likes you or not? Why is something that intimate so trivial to you?

If she doesn't like you, Jarett, she's a freaking psycho.

Hugs and kisses,


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So, what's on your mind, sweetie?



Disclaimer: This column is for entertainment purposes only. I am not a professional therapist or licensed anything for that matter. But that doesn't mean that I don't care.

I reserve the right to edit for grammar, brevity, content, etc. If you'd like to discuss something you've seen here, I invite you to share your experiences. Don't keep it a secret! I welcome your comments.

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