Due to the volume of responses I receive, I am unable to...um, not really. I'm sure I'll have more than enough time to mull over your question.

Today's Column: Chloe's two-times rule and more girls crushing on guys.

 

Dear Chloe,

I have been seeing a girl, we had a couple of great dates with no overt intimacy. I asked her to have coffee with me, and she said yes, and we decided that she would call me after she had eaten lunch and finished some stuff she had to do. She never called. When I called her, she apologized, and asked to reschedule. So we did, with the same plan -- she didn't call again. I emailed her, and she responded immediately, she had gone out with her sister. I don't know how to read this, because it isn't like her -- I know her fairly well, and she doesn't blow people off like that. Also, I really thought she was into me. Anyways, if you could give me some advice, or something, i'd appreciate it.

Sincerely,

Hopelessly-Confused-Boy

 

Dear HCB,

Hmm, I'm not sure what is going on with this girl, but signs point to not that interested. Could there be a problem unrelated to you, like with her parents, or her sister, that might be troubling her?

I have a two-times rule (with casual acquaintance types, or people I'm just getting to know). Blow me off two times in a row, and it's bub-bye. Your girl might not be mature enough to pursue a relationship. She may have lost interest, or she may be afraid of getting hurt.

If there are extenuating circumstances, like death or major illness, etc., you should cut her some slack. Otherwise, who has time to wonder why? I'd back off and go look up someone else. It's all about respect, and this chick isn't showing you any.

 Bonus question!

Dear Chloe,

There is this guy whom I like, his name is Andres, he's also 13. Every time I look at him there's this joyful feeling that gets to me and makes me want to go there and kiss him, but the real PROBLEM is that I want him to notice me and think I'm the right girl for him. How can I get him to like me, ask me out, and finally kiss me and never leave me? P.S: Can you give me some tips if you can't answer the question above. PLEASE he is a hottie ^_^

Sincerely,

Princess_HOttIE

 

Dear Prin,

Thirteen, huh? Does your mother know you're on this website? Oh well, I guess it's sort of a free country.

I can't tell you how to get someone to like you. If I did, I'd probably have wads of money and, um, other stuff.

The only way he's going to notice you is if you guys hang out in the same place, and if you make an effort to talk to him. There's no easy way to do this. You can't just weasel into his group of friends, but you can find out what kind of afterschool activities he's involved in and join up. If he's in any of your classes, sit next to him if that's possible. Or ask him for help. Try being a friend first, the way you'd make friends with anyone else.

See if any of your friends know him and can introduce you to him, if you haven't been already. Why wait for him to make a move? Invite him to a group activity, so you don't feel the pressure of asking him for a date. We always put our crushes on a pedestal, but they just want someone who is easy to hang out with. Treat him like you would any other guy.

 Bonus question!

Dear Chloe,

There is a guy whom I like a lot and I am not sure whether he likes me too...Whenever I look at him, the two of us will later look away... His friends will always tease me when he is around... How to know whether or not he likes me? And how can I confront him and befriend him? He seems to be a shy boy.

Sincerely,

Miyabi

 

Dear Miyabi,

Have you seen the Squirtonline survey, How To Tell If Someone Likes You?

Generally, if someone smiles at you and makes a lot of eye contact, he digs you. See also what I said here. It sounds like, with all the gentle teasing and all, that he's interested. If he's shy, why don't you make things a little easier for him? You're friendly with his boys, I'm sure you can find something to talk to him about. Becoming friends first is always a good idea. How have you made friends with other people? By talking and hanging out. Well, it works the same way with guys you like. Just don't be all hung up on the fact that you like him.

Hugs and kisses,

 


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Disclaimer: This column is for entertainment purposes only. I am not a professional therapist or licensed anything for that matter. But that doesn't mean that I don't care.

I reserve the right to edit for grammar, brevity, content, etc. If you'd like to discuss something you've seen here, I invite you to share your experiences. Don't keep it a secret! I welcome your comments.

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